/
/
/
First time sex and what to expect physically and emotionally
Sexual Health & Disorders
Question #8827
22 days ago
31

First time sex and what to expect physically and emotionally - #8827

Anonymously

I’ve been thinking a lot about what to expect during first-time sex, and I realize I have a lot of questions and concerns. I know that everyone’s experience is different, but I’m wondering how to make sure it’s as comfortable and safe as possible. One of my biggest worries is whether first-time sex is always painful, especially for people with vaginas. I’ve read that discomfort can happen if there’s not enough foreplay or if the body isn’t relaxed, but is it possible to avoid pain altogether? Does using a lubricant help, and is there a specific type that’s safest for beginners? I also wonder if bleeding is normal—some people say it happens when the hymen stretches, while others say it’s not common at all. If there is bleeding, how much is considered normal, and when should someone be concerned? Another thing I’m thinking about is how to protect against pregnancy and STDs. I know condoms are a must, but do they always work, or is there a risk of failure even when used correctly? Should someone also use another form of birth control just to be safe? I also wonder about emotional expectations—do people usually feel nervous or anxious beforehand, and is it normal to feel differently about sex afterward? If someone feels discomfort or emotional distress after their first time, is that something they should talk to an allopathic doctor about, or is it usually just an adjustment period? Lastly, if someone doesn’t have a great experience their first time, does that mean future experiences will always be the same, or does it get better with time and comfort?

First time sex
First time intercourse
Safe sex
First time sex pain
Birth control
Emotional concerns about sex
Std protection
Question is closed

On the Ask Doctors service, online consultations with doctors for Sexual Health & Disorders are available for any issue that concerns you. Expert doctors provide consultations around the clock and for free. Ask your question and get an answer right away!

Doctors’ responses

Dr. Evgeny Arsentev
I am a highly qualified medical professional with over 15 years of experience in General Medicine. My expertise spans diagnosing and treating a wide range of conditions, providing evidence-based care, and mentoring junior doctors. I am dedicated to ensuring patient well-being through a combination of clinical skills and compassionate care.
21 days ago
It's completely normal to have questions and concerns about first-time sex, and addressing these can help ensure a more comfortable and positive experience. Here are some key points to consider regarding the various aspects you've mentioned. Pain During First-Time Sex: First-time sex does not have to be painful, but some individuals with vaginas may experience discomfort. Factors such as lack of foreplay, tension, and anxiety can contribute to this. To enhance comfort, engage in sufficient foreplay to ensure arousal and relaxation. Communication with your partner about comfort levels and boundaries is crucial. Using Lubricants: Lubricants can greatly aid in reducing friction, making the experience more comfortable. Water-based lubricants are often recommended for beginners, as they are safe to use with condoms and easy to clean. Avoid oil-based lubricants if you are using latex condoms because they can weaken the material. Bleeding Considerations: Bleeding is not universally experienced during first-time sex and can vary significantly among individuals. Some people may bleed if the hymen stretches, but this is not a reliable indicator of virginity. If bleeding occurs, it may be minor and should not be heavy. If it is heavy, accompanied by severe pain, or continues beyond a day, it's advisable to seek medical attention. Protecting Against Pregnancy and STDs: Condoms are effective for reducing the risk of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and preventing pregnancy when used correctly. However, there is a slight risk of failure due to improper use or breakage. To enhance protection against pregnancy, consider discussing additional contraceptive methods with a healthcare provider, such as hormonal birth control options. Emotional Expectations: It's quite common to feel nervous or anxious before first-time sex, and feelings may vary afterward as well. Your emotional response can depend on individual expectations and experiences. If discomfort or feelings of distress occur post-intercourse, it's important to acknowledge them and consider having an open discussion with a healthcare professional if concerns persist. Future Sexual Experiences: Every sexual experience is unique, and discomfort or negative feelings during the first encounter do not predict future experiences. Many individuals find that intimacy can improve over time as comfort and communication with partners grow. In summary, focus on clear communication, ensuring comfort through sufficient foreplay, and utilizing lubrication. Take necessary precautions against pregnancy and STDs with appropriate contraceptives and practice safe sex. If you have further physical or emotional concerns, do not hesitate to speak with a healthcare provider who can offer support and guidance tailored to your specific needs.
Accepted response

0 replies

If you need a detailed answer, ask your question to a doctor

A doctor will answer all of your questions, advise you what to do now to get better, what to do in the future, what best treatments and practices should be followed.

About our doctors

Only qualified doctors who have confirmed the availability of medical education and other certificates of medical practice consult on our service.


Related questions